"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage."
- Anais Nin

You're probably not confident when you have little or no experience with something, so you need courage. During graduate school, I accepted my first public speaking engagement. It was about two months away, and for those two months the thought of presenting twisted my stomach into knots and I often felt like vomiting. Most people don't realize this, but I am shy and introverted. In grade school, I never raised my hand because I was afraid of being wrong and embarrassed. So when I delivered my first presentation, I was so scared that I read my handwritten script word-for-word from a pad of yellow paper - while sitting and shaking.

This first presentation may sound like a disaster, but it was actually quite glorious. Why? Because I learned that I wouldn't die speaking to a group of people! This was a huge victory because I had the courage to go face to face with one of my greatest fears (public speaking), and as Anais Nin said above, this experience expanded my life. I have now delivered over 400 public presentations and have gained more confidence with each one. Today, I love empowering audiences with courage and confidence knowledge.

When you need courage, access your courageous self. Here are the four steps:

Breathe slowly and deeply.
Remember a time when you acted with courage and had a positive outcome.
Notice how you feel as you do this; you are now in your courageous self.
While in your courageous self, imagine doing something that is scary to you. See, hear and feel yourself as best you can, courageously going for what you want.
This process programs your brain to be courageous and helps you gain confidence in doing what you imagined. The more you do this, the stronger your courage and confidence become.

"A mind that is stretched by a new experience
can never go back to its old dimensions."
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

- TC North, Ph.D., High Performance Expert